How do they cope?

After talking with my tutor about counseling service in Cambodia, I realized that Khmer people find other ways to cope with their experience from the Khmer Rouge Regime, Vietnam War and Civil War. My tutor told me that there are only 26 counselors in Cambodia and most of them are in the capital, Phnom Penh. Then, I wonder how do these people learn to cope? What are their outlets?

Most Khmer in the capital seems to be doing well. They drive their motorcycles or cars to places and works. Most houses have businesses in front of their houses. What a great idea combining a house with small business. This could save the future issues of space. However, no matter how much the government try to hide the history of Khmer Rouge, there are sadness in their eyes. I don’t know how they do it. They continue with their lives and not talk about their feelings or the experiences that they went though.



My outlets were school, soccer and break dancing. I had mentors, teachers, coaches who were there for me through my middle school years until my adulthood. I couldn’t imagination if I didn’t have ways to express my angry or emotions, then where would it goes to? What would of happen to me? Would I go crazy? To me, people here love to talk about their experiences just no one to listen. Just few years ago, the government did not allow Khmer to talk about Khmer Rouge era or any kind of history. What they don’t know is that by not allowing Khmer people to talk about what they went throw, create more problem within the country.



From what I heard and witness so far, there are ways that Khmer people, mostly men deal with their pain, anger and hate. One of the coping is Karaoke. Believe it or not, Karaoke is a great way to forget your problem or pain at least for a bit. It takes you to a place where joy and happiness exist. Almost every house on my block carries a karaoke system in their house. Matter in fact; it wakes me up every morning along with the crying dogs’ barks.

Although, what I notice so far is that men are mostly at these Karaoke bars. As for women who are at the bars; those who work there or young attractive girls. What strange to me might be normal to Khmer people but men would dance and sing with each other even though there are no girls around. They seem to be very touchy and careless since they are drunk. However, with this kind of behavior in the states, it appears to be gay behaviors. I think is part of their culture that men are very close to each other than women are with one another. They are very friendly to each other.

Karaoke is a very big part of Khmer people life and culture. On almost of the Khmer channels, play Karaoke songs. I would see this in the morning before I go to school,in the afternoon before go to the gym and in the evening taking a break from studying. People would sing along. You would see it on tourist bus too. Is like, they try to hide their trouble by singing their pain out through Karaoke. Surprisingly, most of them are very good at it. Is not like in America people would just sing with no talent. But here, everyone seems to have talent in singing. They put their soul, voice and attitude towards whatever song they are singing to at the moment.



Another coping is dancing. In the evening around 5:30pm and on, you would see Khmer people dancing on the streets. The dance is in both western and Khmer style. It is a form of exercise? I haven’t joined them yet but I plan to. It looks fun. Is like taking hip hop class at a gym or as a university course. Most of these dancers includes; women, youth, small children, and men. Every time I pass by from the gym, is always looks fun.



You see, there are ways that Khmer people cope with their pain, anger, and sadness. However, it is not enough. I truly think there should be some kind of counseling programs available to them or at least a group therapy. I notice each person I encounter would love to share their experiences with me. They just need someone to talk and listen to. We all do, is in us. Besides singing and dancing, I think people just try to keep busy. Otherwise, they would face withdrawals, I have seen this.